Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Labels

I don’t know if you long time readers remember but there were guys on here who gave me all kinds of shit about labels.  Am I gay? Am I straight? Am I bi? And then of course I used the “f” word.  Ok curious guys.  Take it from me.  Don’t use the term “fag”.  It’s apparently considered big time derogatory (though I never quite figured out why “fag” is bad but “queer” is ok).  So what I learned is that labels are bullshit and I can overhaul as many engines as humanly possible but it’s not gonna make me what the world considers 100% straight.  So I’m kinda out there beating to my own drum.  But at least I know there’s other douchebags like you out there lol.

66 comments:

  1. Let me offer my perspective as a gay man. This is my opinion only, so please don't all bash me for it- okay?

    "Fag" or "Faggot" when slung by a straight guy is like the N word being thrown out there by a white guy. It's guaranteed to get you in a whole heap of trouble. You follow me?

    "Queer" can be used by anyone but it depends on how it's used. If you spew it at someone in a tone that suggests you're using it as a slur or an epithet, be prepared for a fight. If you're referring to "Queer Culture", "Queer Studies", etc. then it's okay to use whether you're gay or not.

    At least that's MY understanding of the rules for those terms.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have always thought that we use labels to help organize our minds or categorize other people. The ONLY labels I recognize are self labels. I don't give a damn if you guys all think I am gay because I enjoy male sex. I still think I am mostly straight or at least bi. And I don't give a damn if you agree with me. I find it humorous that some self proclaimed gay guys say that ONE sexual experience with a man makes you gay but one sexual experience with a woman does not make you straight!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sometimes - forgive me guys!! - you just gotta say, "Fuck the rules." And when it comes to labeling sexuality, lately the rules seem to be in a constant state of flux. Am I str8 with homosexual tendencies? Am I gay with str8 tendencies?? Who really gives a shit???

    We use labels because society forces us to use them. We, as sentient beings, require a "name" for things, otherwise we don't know how to process information and it drives us batshit!

    Me? I describe myself as Bi, because I truly am capable of being aroused EQUALLY by guys and girls. So, Scott, use whatever label YOU are comfortable with, whatever YOU feel describes you.

    And don't attempt to place any label of any kind onto another person; let them label themselves and you are then permitted to utilize it in reference to them. For instance, I have one friend who calls himself a "fag" and he's not bothered by others' usage of it in describing him.

    But, with all that said, wouldn't it be nice to finally reach a point where society could just accept "sexual" and be done with it?

    ReplyDelete
  4. As far as I know using Faggot to describe gays comes from Germany in world war two.

    A faggot is originally a piece of wood or turf cut to be used in a fire.

    During WW2 the Nazis used it about gays in concentration camps. Hence the poor taste "joke".
    What did the Nazis do to keep warm in Auschwitz?
    Threw another faggot on the fire.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I think there is a valid point in that labels are somewhat arbitrary, and are a social construct used to control those with less power. It would be ideal to live in a society without labels.

    On the other hand, for those who are stuck with a label, it's usually the best to own it. I'm not saying you need to own a new label, but many are stuck with them, and take the power from them by owning them.

    If you don't like labels, though, then why have the word "Straight" in your blog title?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Wouldn't it be nice to just take all of the labels that knock people and degrade people and throw them out the windows and just love one another for who we are?
    If you who are bi and were in an accident and a gay went to help you. Would you turn him or her away? If someone were on a battlefield and needed a blood transfusion, would you say no to that person because he is gay?
    Would you deny someone helping you if your house was on fire and a gay fireman brought you to safety? Would you do the same, if that person were gay and his or house were on fire?
    Would you deny a gay doctor from treating your son or daughter who was in a car accident?
    We have all heard about the flooding and the fires that are happening in this country. We have all heard about how people are opening their doors to help one another. Isn't there a lesson to be learned here.
    I have a friend who had an older partner for thirty years. The partner was in the hospital and dying. The younger partner had to use the name of his partner's brother to get into the hospital to take care of his dying partner. The hospital had the right to deny the 30 year partner admittance to his partners room.
    We have one life to live. Live it with sharing. Live it with pride. Lift the stone to see what is underneath it.
    This weekend will be Independence Day, let us all celebrate it. Be grateful for what we have and to honor those who serve and protect this beautiful country that we live in.
    In closing, have a beautiful Hot Dog!

    ReplyDelete
  7. "Queer" became acceptable as soon as it became politicized. The politcal group, Queer Nation chose it's name with a lot of thought (and debate), but once it became a word of "empowerment", it became acceptable for queers to use. A good analogy is the "n" word: there are black people who have little hesitation to use it amongst themselves. The word "queer" became a way to take that negative power and turn it into a positive. BTW, a "fag" is a cigarette in England.
    Artful1

    ReplyDelete
  8. All the lovely terms in the above posts are detrimental depending on the tone and circumstance in which used. Being called a faggot, queer, cocksucker, fairy, queen are all degrading as far as I'm concerned. Only uneducated guys with limited language ability use such terms. I had a general once who often told his officers that if you had to swear to express yourself, then your a moran. Same is true for guys who use these terms for gays.

    ReplyDelete
  9. PDQ, anonymous at 5:38 pm, you have nailed it, you have said what I was thinking, but I don't know if I could have worded it as well as you have...

    Scott says:
    "It’s apparently considered big time derogatory (though I never quite figured out why “fag” is bad but “queer” is ok)."

    I hope you have figured it out now Scott...

    remember the army dude that said he had the fag "suck his cock", and you thought nothing of printing that... which by the way still shocks me.. oh and your big thing was I don't censor anything, bs.. you should have been a little bit more thoughtful...

    ReplyDelete
  10. Degrading. Empowerment. Bullshit. They are words, crybabies. Like doo-doo! mommy, mommy, mikey said doo-doo. People can call me, in my presence or not, whatever they damned well please. I don't care.

    ReplyDelete
  11. OH, does someone needs a timeout, must have been hitting the bottle and it wasn't milk you were drinking, you insensitive boobie. yes you talk like a child, you have to me treated like a child.

    ReplyDelete
  12. OK guys, here's how this straight guy uses labels. When hanging with my buddies, if the subject of someone being gay comes up, there are almost always jokes made to put down or make fun of that lifestyle. The jokes usually reference bending over or sucking dick.
    We can call someone gay, and it's not really meant in a mean way. But if a guy is really over the top effeminate, that's when the term fag is used. Fag or faggot is meant to really be a putdown, and express disgust.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Here's how I understand it. Yes, "faggot" was originally a British word for a small piece of wood. In 19th century British private schools, the younger boys were supposed to run errands for the older boys. When an older boy wanted some more faggots for the small fire in his room, he'd holler "FAGGOT" out his door into the hall, and the boys would come running. The last one to get there was the one stuck with doing the errand.

    In time, "faggot" got shortened to "fag," and was used to call for a boy for any kind of errand at all - get hot water for tea, wash socks, etc. "Fag" came to mean any younger boy subservient to an older boy. Given the rampant homosexuality in many English private schools, it's not too hard to see the rest of the evolution of the word use. - Breezyknees

    ReplyDelete
  14. The time Scott used the word "fag" was an INNOCENT MISTAKE. How can you accuse him of insensitivity when he had no idea it would offend? He has NEVER used it that way sense. His NOT using it shows he is sensitive to opinions. He may call himself a jerk but he has shown himself to be a good guy.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Scott, Benchpecs here. I know you only wanted "curious" / 'straight' dudes to comment. Even though I am a proud card carrying homosexual now. I lived the straight life for my first 38 years. Was / am an athlete -- was popular in school, played football, dated and fucked a lot of women, married and fathered children who I love deeply. Now I am divorced and out.

    You seem to really be hung up on the label thing. That's ok most guys go through this. The society and specifically religion wants us to be. Homosexualy is natural and is old as the hills. The word homosexuality --the label is new fisrt coined in 1869 by an Austrian. In ancient Greece and Rome homosexduality was more or less accepted. There was no word for it...it was just seen as another form of sex. Just as there are many ways to have sex with a girl there are many ways to have man sex.... 2000 years ago it was just seen as part of the spectrum of sex. Not till the 1950s and the Kinsey Report did that concept reappear.

    There are many many sub groups of the gay world. Obviously I am attracted to the muscular masculine types. That is who I hang out with, and date. But that is just me. I am in total solidarity in a political sense with all gay men ... we are all fighting for equality. So even though I am attracted to bodybuilders... I respect other gay men... who am I to say that a skinny femmy twink is wrong and I am right. All gay men are my brothers. That brings me to the issue of PRIDE. In June the month of the Stone Wall Riots we calibration Pride. Why do we celebrate Pride? It is because traditionally the society made homosexuals feel SHAME ... the opposite is pride. As a gay friend of mine told me when I was coming out "Face it dude your a Big Homo" I have faced it and am proud of it. Another friend says "It is not a choice, we are born this way....but if it were a choice I would choose it all over again"
    BENCHPECS

    ReplyDelete
  16. Well...the labels that I've come to understand have more to do with "identity" and less to do with where you stick your cock. Gay people lead a gay lifestyle, out and proud and all that. Straight people do the same. And a true bi-sexual is someone who has engaged in a mutual-fulfilling, loving OUT relationship with members of both sexes. NOT just getting their rocks off under the cover of darkness (or shame). So all you guys who say your bi here...but would NEVER admit it to your friends or family...I would call straight. Cuz that's how you're living your lives. I've had sex with 2 women in my life...but would never consider myself bi. I AM gay. That make sense to anyone?

    ReplyDelete
  17. Fag = bad, in today's world when talking about anyone that likes the same sex. PERIOD

    ReplyDelete
  18. I disagree Fag is like the "N" word if you are one you get to use it. And since Scott sucks cock he gets to use it. Period.

    Benchpecs

    ReplyDelete
  19. Benchpecs it's June 29 not April Fools's Day, dude you just shocked many people. Very bad joke.

    ReplyDelete
  20. anonymous at 9:18 am, Scott didn't use the word, he interviewed someone and the dude said, something to the effect sure the little fag was a great cocksucker. and Scottie boy just took the down everything he said, bet he didn't even bat an eyelash when the military dude said FAG. Many were surprised but Scott just ignored it.

    ReplyDelete
  21. June 29th 2011 ---- well it looks like the thought police are alive and well. You would have loved Nazi Germany where words, ideas and thoughts were controlled. Oh yeah and book burning. Gay guys use the "F" word all the time. Don't give the word so much power that to say it is evil. Frankly it is not the word it is how it is said. Yes I am ofended if a biggot uses it in a derogatory way. But it can and is used in many other ways by gay people.

    June 29th 11:10 get over it.

    Benchpecs --- one proud Fag.

    ReplyDelete
  22. What's in a name (label)? Quite a lot actually. Go back to Biblical times, the power to name something meant knowledge (egghead and carnal knowledge - as in Sam "knew" Sally and she begat Oscar - that kind of knowledge) which meant power. "[God] brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name." (Gen.I:19). Since God could not be comprehended by mere mortals, it was forbidden to say his name. Thus, the tetragrammaton: YHWH (which later became the basterdized Yahweh / Jehoveh). And don't forget the 3rd commandment: "Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain." So names were important and the power to name something gave a person the ultimate power over that which was named.

    Contrast that with my man Will's take on names: "What's in a name? that which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet." (Romeo and Juliet). In other words, names meant nothing.

    As with most things, the truth probably lies somewhere in the middle. Retain the power of naming and call yourself whatever the hell you please. Be careful what you call another person. Names mean something but they can't change who or what you are. Nevertheless, sticks and stones CAN hurt. So show some respect!

    Our friendly blogmaster pervert has never knowingly disprespected anyone. Ever.

    ReplyDelete
  23. "I can overhaul as many engines as humanly possible but it’s not gonna make me what the world considers 100% straight." A line to remember! Well done,

    ReplyDelete
  24. IMHO, Anon 8:13 has the Word on faggot. It certainly absolutely totally fits with how the word has come to be used and clears it up for me. Viscerally, I hate the word, but I don't like "gay" either, but for different reasons. Me? I'm homosexual.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I don't like gay really either, I guess homosexual would be the way to go, but I absolutely hate the word "fag", so I wondered why and looked it up and this is what I got.

    Faggot, often shortened to fag, is a pejorative term and common slur used chiefly in North America, AGAINST, homosexual males..

    I guess that's good enough reason for me.

    ReplyDelete
  26. "disprespected??????" guess that's enuf bombay sapphire martinis for today.
    cheers!

    ReplyDelete
  27. ah, Karen Walker loved her sapphire martinis, she might have called Will and Jack, homo's, moe's, mary's but I never remember her saying the word "FAG".

    Could be wrong, but don't think so..

    ReplyDelete
  28. Sorry "dumbbell"oops I meant benchpecs, at anonymous 11:32 pm, I can get over alot of things but nobody better call me a "fag"... No I won't hurt them, I just never talk to them again..

    ReplyDelete
  29. I guy in the pic has a great body, but if you take a closer look, he looks like a cocky dude that would use the word "FAG" at the drop of a hat, and that takes away all his good looks..

    JUST SAYING...

    Ps: dudes not get cocky mixed up with a dude that has confidence, that attribute I respect.

    ReplyDelete
  30. i am cool with str8 guys calling me a fag. it's hot. :)

    ReplyDelete
  31. Here's a fun clip that winds up getting a bit serious at the end...

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